Thursday, June 25, 2009

The Real Reason Behind Jr's Dismal 2007 Season

originally posted 3/16/2008 on


Mooresville, NC- A six month long investigation has uncovered the real reason behind Dale Earnhardt, Jr.'s disappointing final season with Dale Earnhardt, Inc.

Throughout the 2007 season, many fans speculated that Earnhardt, Jr.'s stepmother, Theresa, was behind the bad luck which plagued NASCAR's most popular driver. Those speculations proved unfounded with the discovery that an imposter had been posing as Junior's crew chief, Tony Eury, Jr. The imposter has been identified as Larry, the Cable Guy.

Members of Junior's former DEI crew were shocked to learn of the imposter, but no one was as shocked as Junior himself.

"The man is my cousin," Junior told reporters. "We grew up together. You'd think I'd know my own cousin." Other Earnhardt family members said that they, too, were taken aback by the uncanny resemblance of the imposter to Tony, Jr. Side by side photos show the strong resemblance between the two men

Martin Truex, Jr., Dale Jr.'s former DEI teammate said upon seeing the photos, "Man, they sure do look alike, but obviously the imposter couldn't "Git r done"."

Team officials at Hendrick Motorsports, which signed Jurnior after his much publicized split with DEI, told reporters that they have instituted security measures that will guarantee that it is indeed Tony Eury, Jr. on the pit box . A Hendrick spokesman refused to comment on what those security measures are.

A follow up blog was posted 5/28/09


The crack investigative staff at Beagle News Network has just uncovered the REAL reason behind Tony Eury Jr's departure as crew chief of the #88.

Earlier today, Hendrick Motorsports announced that Tony Jr. will step down from the pit box and take a position in the company's Research and Development department. An anonymous spokesman at HMS offered further explanation, "Tony Jr. will be researching new material to further develop his comedy career as Larry the Cable Guy."

According to the website, Tony Jr's alter-ego, Larry the Cable Guy, will be kicking off his latest comedy tour June 13 in Manchester, UK. He will follow that with dates in London, Wolverhampton, and Dublin, Ireland before returning stateside for a July 4th appearance in Lincoln, Nebraska.

We here at BNN wish both Tony and Larry much success in their upcoming endeavors.

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